Monday, 15 December 2008

Answers and lots of hard work ahead.

I had my second psychologist appointment yesterday and after having completed a food diary for a fortnight and describing the way I eat and how I feel and how they interact, I have been diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder (BED).

I always just thought I was a fat pig!

I had heard of BED before, the psych who did my initial evaluation suggested I keep a food diary for a few weeks before my sessions started because she thought I may have it but I guess up until I found out more about it I didn't really take it seriously. I mean are you really trying to tell me the way I stuff my face has a reason behind it???

So I'll be following a programme developed by the world's leading expert on eating disorders which will involve me following certain steps to understand what triggers a binge and how to overcome that. The first two steps are monitoring and getting into a regular eating pattern, which I kind of do now through Calorie King but this is really amped up. It's more about not only recording which foods I'm eating and when but the specific feelings and thoughts I'm having at the time. Also I have to eat at certain times of the day and if I have a binge at 5pm but I'm scheduled to have dinner at 6pm then I have to make sure I don't skip that meal as that will then lead to a further binge later on. My body is so out of whack from years of eating disorders (I'm pretty sure you all know I was anorexic in high school) that it needs to be retrained into knowing when to eat and when to know to eat.

Anyway we're in the very early days so far but I'll keep you all updated with how I'm going.